maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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