we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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