Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
