I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Randomize
