ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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