but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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