im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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