you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Randomize