I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
