so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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