her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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