what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
