OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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