Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
