Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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