bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
