Have you finally orgasmed yet?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
