Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
