Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize