Are we in a gay sports bar?
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
