There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
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