areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Randomize
