friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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