Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
