I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Randomize
