i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
