you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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