Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize