He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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