i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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