Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
