the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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