Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
