you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
