she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize