yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
