hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Success! We fucked roommates!
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
