The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
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