I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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