Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
