hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
