the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Barsexuality is the new black.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Randomize
