no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
