You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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