if i can run in heels then i can drive
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Drake has all the answers
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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