idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize