I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
