i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
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