my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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