I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Randomize
