and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize