Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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